Help and support

With the exception of 'Support after a Suicide', the downloadable documents on this page are short and in Word 6 format. If for any reason your computer can't download and print a document, please contact the national office by e-mail at sobs.admin@care4free.net and we will send you a copy.

Support after a suicide

Death by suicide is the most personal act any person can make, involving a wide circle of people - the survivors. This document is intended to help survivors along the path following a bereavement by suicide.  'Support after Suicide' is a 36 page booklet.

 

Download 'Support after a suicide'

 

Stress

"Stress can and does come in many guises, and can be caused by many different things. It can manifest itself in many different ways. Stress can and does affect men and women from all walks of life, young and old, rich and poor, no matter what your job, or even if you have no job...."

 

(by permission of David Reeves, President of the National Register of Advanced Hypnotherapists)

 

Download 'Stress'

 

Rights of the survivor

"The survivor has the right to mourn in his or her own way and within the time it takes...."
(by permission of "Werkgroep Verder" - the Flemish region of Belgium's suicide support organisation)....

 

Download 'Rights of the survivor'

 

The way forward

" For so many Survivors the initial reaction is that it is very difficult to see a way forward. Many friends and 'advisors' will expect you to 'get on with your life' and be back to 'normal' after a very short time. This will very rarely be the case...."

 

Download 'The way forward'

 

A letter to suicide survivors from Adina Wrobleski

" My daughter, Lynn, killed herself in 1979. I have been where you are now; I know how badly it hurts. I know that you feel the most terrible aloneness of your life. It is normal for you to feel desperately unhappy, angry, guilty frightened, and out of control. You wouldn't feel so awful if you hadn't loved so much...."

 

Download 'A letter to suicide survivors'

 

The survivor's choice

" The survivor of a suicide bereavement faces a stark choice - 'it is up to you...to decide whether to be permanently hurt by the last act of a free individual or not...this option is YOURS'. (Lake 1984) "

 

Download 'The survivor's choice'

 

Surviving a child's suicide

" The loss of a child is terrible. But the loss of a child through suicide bears an added dimension of pain because it is rarely spoken about. I have a need to break that silence....."

 

Download 'Surviving a child's suicide'

 

How does a father cope with the loss of a dear son

" It is difficult to know how anyone feels when they lose a child, especially when they choose to take their own life. You can never think anything like that will happen to you. I am very fortunate in that as a family we are very loving, we show our feelings and we can talk to one another...."

 

Download 'How does a father cope...'

 

Brothers and sisters, the hidden grievers

" It is all too easy to forget the brothers and sisters of the family. Very often the brother or sister will be asked 'How are you' (as an introduction) and 'How is your mother coping' as the main cause of concern on the assumption that the sibling is perfectly able to cope. This can be very far from the truth. Brothers and sisters are very likely to have been very close and so their bereavement can be very intense, far more than we might expect...."

 

Download 'Brothers and sisters...'

 

Friends can help

Written primarily for the friend - " Often, immediately following a suicide death, friends rally around and show support. But over time they may appear to be less concerned and their contact may become less frequent ...."

 

Download 'Friends can help'